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Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Sunday ahead.


dream of my passed dad and his dying elder brother. ^ my uncle died 3 days after my grand dad passed by on Dec 18, 2006. the dark soul endured to see my dad to leave, likely in bitter war in his heart envious. he suffered unhappy marriage almost all his life. in the dawn dream my lifetime kind Father sat on left, facing me, talked to me smiling. his brother sat on the right, we likely around a fire for warmth. my sinful 2nd elder brother on my right side to prepare death of the uncle. Dad, God, I knew doubtless who is the loser before this dream. Dad, glory untouchable over u, testifies this dream and this sunny morning. 


dreamed of romance in doze.^ in noon doze I covered my head with coat and dreamed lovely girl. an sweet lady editor came over to find why I, or my son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, entertained so much in digital world, by style in non-mainstream, and she found it and shifted to support us. It sunny since morning, but started to snow near lunch time. now it turns wonderfully sunny again. God, bring me sooner my girls u promised me, and my son in his future that incomparable weighted. God, my dream comes true, dad, world u makes cater to us, by value the Son valving, from undercover. 


dream of secret association of my hometown. ^ in dawn dream, I in dash to get train ticket for lunar spring festival hometown tour while in sinking PRC train can be constantly scarce in the season. the Hubei, my hometown province, has secret geo-community around and I got contact with it. they lived in underground in deserted wasteland. they arranged me get the train even with their own car, among my anxiousness. then I closely watched their operation, their brain. also another young lady serves him. they made projects and had original ideas, say put their nest hanging on power line.
the past week I worked hard. less movement left my stomach inflated enough to hurt other parts in my body and let me uncomfortable. I finally decided to take over feazrland.co from my kid brother who paid the first 2 year's registry fee, after found he posed protectively upon my helping hand. he refused talk to me after I urged him to decide if adopt zoho enterprise suite associated with the domain. his dog behavior, threaten me by tighten mouth, refute by ignore, hurts me, so I exile him from the domain I concocted when I was in Holy Spirit adventure, in the asylum. now, I'd so glad I had a domain for my own first domain name, faezrland, with my son has another but direct, faezrland.me . God, dad, let's steer our Noah's ark out of bay now. God, bring me sooner my Royal China, to home my son, warrenzh, Hope of China, God of Universe, and to family my girls in praying for me so long. 


dreamed of my kid brother & warrenzh, my son.^ yesterday is a busy while wonderful day. my son, warrenzh, made progress in video games with me, who prepared the reunion for days when he stayed in QRRS Dorms. my son invited me to watch 3-D movie with which he watched previously with his mom. we planed carefully and it turned out a great success. we ate toast buffet in Golden Hans, then we went to the cinema by taxi. we didn't wait too long before the movie running. even the outdated shabby chairs hurting, the movie is nice. half way I shift my son onto my laptops to save his bottom from the stiff chair. also luckily we took a taxi among over-crowd before chilled down outside after the movie, when a heavy snow on Saturday still heaped thick. this dawn I dreamed my kid brother, who hurt by my knowledge on Internet & tighten his mouth for resentment, visited me here. I encouraged him being more open, confident and he made improvement relaxed. after peed I dreamed I with my son visiting a display, cinema or museum, happily. the time I hanging in the dream with my son is long but the vivid evaded me as soon as I woke up & prepared to blog. God, bring sooner my Royal China so as to allow me home my son, who growing & need my greater responsibility. God, bring me sooner my Crowded Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, and my girl Taiwan, who once so close me. God, dad, thx for the rich weekends. 


dreamed of genius & password crisis. ^these days heat dropping indoor in QRRS Dorms, where benzrad 朱子卓 lingered for his new family. I had to cover my coat over quilt in night. these days also draining, for my kid brother in southern China exert terrorism upon my advantage technical and expressive, by ignore ruthless my query and helping hand. this morning I dreamed the sinful monitor in office tempted me to leave my usb stick his drawer. but I found my err first &protected my confidential due before he notice. then dreamed genius kid, say my son, warrenzh 朱楚甲. likely echoes of an American episode, "touch", which so convincing, I watched recently. this is a sunny early spring morning, I got my breakfast in dorm canteen, which so nice. God, cease fire between my kid brother and me. bring firm my Royal China to home my son and offspring arriving. God, dad, thx for time I enjoyed and seeking more funs. 

From 2013 in gaze
From 2013 in gaze

Posted via email from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly...鸠昱隆嘉

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

means to sustain.


falling bitch. ^ last night visit my son. his mother cursed me &threaten banning me reuniting son in her house. the night we didn't play video games as usual. I just waited while his trifle mom accompany him doing homeworks. when roaming alone in waiting room, I felt so lucky to dump her, the cheap messy bitch. I pray God shows me my choice so righteous, praying my son witness the end of evil in the woman. later his mom allow him watching animation online, he pushed me out of his screen as usual. but I notice many half naked woman in the Japanese animation, so I warned my son's danger of porn. on way leaving the house, God assured me intact of my son's sanity among the bitch woman's dirty environment. this dawn I slept deep, dreamed a lot about my campus life in Nankai Univ. on way back from check-in QRRS card reading system, I still felt the shame and dirty being cursed by the bitch, my son's mom, who nowadays more and more frequently called me freak. God, dirty in her mouth has to be swallowed by the spiller. save my happy time with my son in our weekly reunion. God, bring sooner my Royal China to allow me housing my son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, Hope of China, God of Universe. God, dad, thx for the peace after shames of being cursed by falling demon. 


family got 7th domain, faezrland.me. ^ family got 7th domain, faezrland.me. ^ God don't let us anxious about things definite. after help my kid brother get his new domain, faezrland.co, I felt its time to claim my family a domain for my father, who bring out the domain spiritually, faezrland, back when I was trapped in asylum while my kid brother visiting us from southern China he hard earned for several years, in my adversity to battle evils against my son &my vested glory on the earth. the reason I so late to claim faezrland for my grand dad, God in Heaven now, is that I had urgent domains to serve, like what we had, be21zh.org for our 1109 years' Empire of China rebirth, zhuson.com for US and China under God's shine, benzrad.us for myself, warozhu.com/wozon.net/woz.fm for my son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, Hope of China, God of Universe, in his title explicit gracious. at that time I felt faezrland is a far dream for my dad in Heaven. but in the process of register faezrland.co for my kid brother, I felt the urgency to claim my own faezrland, for due protection, for the holy presence. the next days I tried to contact people in my social circle for fund. refuted twice, the 3rd one I reached out, my senior middle school and also my Nankai Univ alumnus, offer hand within seconds' exchange of words. God, I saw the sunshine since the day U promised me. God, help us grasp firmly our web property. bring me sooner my Royal China, bring my offspring prosperous! 


dreamed wounded by iron wire. ^ this days very busy with setup my kid brother's new domain, faezrland.co. I felt its a great triumph to explore great product like zoho standard suite for enterprise. yesterday afternoon I visit my son with elation. he was proud of his progress in video games &gabbled a lot. this morning I felt sleepy for check-in QRRS, my once and long time employer. in doze I dreamed my foot hurt by iron wire. after checked carefully, I pull out the uneven wires in flesh and pains gone. God, my time is ripe for Royal China. bring my girls, esp. Asoh Yukiko, my Crowed Queen from Japan, my Taiwan girl who once so near to me, into my life in praying sooner. God, grant me a new domain for my passed grand dad, God in Heaven now, and my vested land promising. thx God. 


Chinese mafia gathering beyond me. ^ yesterday visited my son as usual &made proud progress in video game "borderlands 2". told my son I more and more upset by Chinese, esp. insane PRC. for recently I saw local mafia shown more recklessly to prey. one of my Nankai Univ alumnus also invited to meet me when his train journey porting Qiqihar. he lived hell &trying influencing my life's choice with humiliation. I more and more felt the ruling party, like its tyranny, was in flame and gaining speed spinning around, begging Chinese society in PRC help putting off its burning fur, as well as fat under skin after eras of indulged power, robbery &whoredom . It doomed to die in fire baptism, and new China Empire under my title emerging as freedom of Chinese under God's shine. this dawn dreamed of my kid brother in southern China, who operating a small business & recently helped me twice, paid a year registration of my son's 3rd domain, woz.fm, paid my order to replace my 2 wrecked shoes online. I dreamed the sinful cousin, eldest son of my dad's eldest brother, a fell bureaucracy preyed his patriots, like most cases in Chinese history the way northwestern dominator did upon whole China, and my parents and his villagers suffered. when I was busy with fixing my gears, my mother came and told me my kid brother dying after suffering. I let her shut up, for I don't believe. God, this is my prayer today, rid my kid brother zombie hanging around him, stop sinful blood thieves, due to my brother's weak will to live up, on him. God, dad, u see our fate of family, lighten up our road toward ever grace. God, bring me sooner my Royal China, glorifies my son's life with honey and pleasure. God, peace in my praying in this morning sunshine! 


dreamed of designing active books. ^ in dawn dream I started a small business. then transfered into printing industry. my kid brother or I wrote 3 very original books. I designed interactive form to display it. one is display on different parts of a panel. another is feeding with string, like tape recorder. I almost succeeded on it before woke up. yesterday a bit busy till near 7 pm. I guessed my son should return from his mom's hometown tour. so I buzzed, my son gave me a healthy welcome on air. I visited him with his dell notebook I fetched before his tour against thief. he played a turn of video game, "dungeonland". returned to dorm, I watched a sci-fiction episode about kids with super-power. the evil neighbor hit the thin wall again. I felt the chill &went to bed after 11 pm. God, Its so nice normal life resumes ahead, and so gracious morning light outside now. bring me my Royal China sooner to allow my honeymoon with my girls in time. God, grant us saintly life and family along life time. 


dreamed of my parents &academy. ^ in dawn dream my parents appeared. I too liked to lingering at home and forgot when the winter vacation ends. so I buzzed Nankai Univ. and informed I should return to campus no later than Feb 6. but the date was Feb 6 or later. so I asked my parents, esp. my dad, help me find excuses. my parents granted. nightmare of academy rewinds. 
my son told me he losing fancy upon video games. God, I hope the day he leaving me alone to video game later. God, I can't afford him more pleasure currently. God, show us the clear and bright road to achievement, glory, and peace. now his mom will soon bring him on board to visit her relatives in other city. God, bring him a shiny way to enjoy life on the earth. 

From 2013 in gaze
From 2013 in gaze
From 2013 in gaze

Posted via email from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly...鸠昱隆嘉

Saturday, February 9, 2013

if shine says.


yes, we satisfied. ^ so rich in 2012! we visited first time 上島 cafe Qiqihar franchise original from Taiwan. we ate breakfast in KFC. son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, Hope of China, God of Universe, got his glasses updated. God, so leaving 2012 means more fantasy ahead?! let's see the brilliant 2013, esp my brilliant TW girl. 


last workday before lunar Spring festival holiday in PRC. ^ In dawn dreamed of lingering in a railway hostel in Henan, where one of my Nankai University alumni came from and aided my son bought his first ebook reader, a kindle paperwhite, recently. I was likely in a tourist group temporarily passing there by. yesterday I visit my son in dusk. I waited for almost an hour before his mom brought him back from her mother's house. this week I visit my son every day, just want to share holiday with him. after returned to my dorm, I felt my son seemingly got angry with his mom, who restrained him from watching animations online, for jealous on we beeped when my son and me shared the cyberspace via skype. God, I'm prepared to live with my son under my custody. God, cheer up the deep love between the father and the son with lighthearted enchanters. God, mercy in my son's heart for bearing love so deep. God, bring me sooner my Royal China to allow full-blown new dynasty of Ming under title of Zhu's. God, shiny is ur admission here holy. 


dreamed of detainment first time.^ last Friday night lately played video game with my son in his mom's house, and luckily caught up with last bus.this dawn dreamed my most cherished gear, say computer or camera or kindle, was confiscated by state security/intelligence agency. I also was invited to talk &record with cops, in PRC its called drinking tea. I more or less panic, but my friends, my parents urged me to sustain high profile. a police friend also warned retreat gains nothing. Its a sunny morning. I still felt the pains of suffering loses. God, peace in ur eyes stronger than anything. God, dad, bring me sooner my new family under Royal China! 


lack of testimony.^ yesterday is wonderful. at noon I in spirit had an idea that I can achieve my long time target, ie. renew my son's new domain, woz.fm in advance by loan. the day before yesterday I got another bonus of 900 RMB from QRRS, my once and long time employer. with it I clean my most short term debts and offer promised lunar Spring festival gift for son, warrenzh 朱楚甲Hope of ChinaGod of Universe. but I felt anxious about when I can renew family's new domain, woz.fm, with which we just got for a year, while other 5 domains mostly we bought 8 - 10 years. after lunch I launched. on godaddy.com I found I wasn't offered other options but exactly one year for renewal. I checkout and buzzed my younger brother who has a small business, faezrland.com 羽朕金属制品, and denied me more than 3 times for loan in the past. but this time he allowed me to borrow swiftly. in wilder joy we talked in air about 20 minutes, about his business and family, our parents, duty of hometown. I hope I didn't hurt him by my generous tips on parenting. soon after I back to online, another debtee of my son's dell notebook bought last year asked to chat via qq, a Chinese mainstream IM. I again offered my vision of life, family expertise, etc. after the 2 talks I fet a bit dirty. in this dawn I dreamed a lot about marriage without bond, without testimony, without order or ruling. I reviewed American marriages I watched in episodes online and knew without abidance world will go nonsense, life go cheap. last night more snow gathered on the ground. God, forgive my talkativeness. let those praying for lacks contented, guide missing souls through darkness to the saint light this snow world. God, dad, purifies my spiritual for ur companion forever, never missing my son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, in my heart even a second. God, Savior, accept my prayer this morning. 


family education.^ last Friday night I taught my son a lesson: he forgot to unplug his xbox wireless gamepad. when I arrived I was glad to see him. then found his gamepad powered by rechargeable battery deadly powerless, which never happened for the battery pack as well as the gamepad itself bought no more than half of a year. I at once lost temper &burst to scorn his carelessness, and loose management likely inherited from his shabby mother, a messy small woman and a inefficient Junior English teacher. my son still chose to visit my dorm in the blizzard night after my burst. we ate KFC, enjoyed video games before he slept in my dorm. the next Sunday we ate noodle he likes additionally with a dish of livers I promised him for coming holiday. we haircut and showered together in an underground bathroom where lots of naked men slept there after their showers. I commented that's strange and likely of gays, but we agreed we should concern no more. next Monday is busy, I sorted family cyberspace assets, prepared my son more video games, till lately visited my son. we made proud progress in our favorite game, "family guy". his playful kick torn my thumb nail, but we had good time while his mom kept distant from us. Its all so nice, but recently I dreamed of my passed dad's once apprentice, a cheap soul in Zhudajiu, where my dad, God in Heaven now, allowed his gay-alike companion in his late years while the apprentice in his prime time. the cheap soul several years ago before my dad's passing by attempted to tempt my dad, saying if kissing my dad. my dad told me when I buzzed in from my dorm for holiday about the abuse. my grand dad soon left the world after I told him I via phone after days warn the event direct the haunting gay, a cheap soul peeking my dad so many years and gained his long time wish, a son he can't breed more than 20s years in his sinful marriage, from my dad's manly leading. I recently also dreamed of the apprentice's son, with a cheap large square face. God, nothing impossible for u. God, dad, cease me from revenge. God, bring me sooner my Royal China, allowing me homing my son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, Hope of China, God of Universe, and my offspring to come ahead. 


dreamed of my passed parents and alumni. ^yesterday quite busy: presenting woz.fm and wozon.net on skype. in the dusk visit my son in his mom's house. his mom's girl friend visiting there with her son, and eating porridge there. the family dominant as usual, shifted my son to play mini flash game online on his mom's shabby notebook under the boy's control. I knew at once my son's mom's cheap and losing. so I picked son's kindle and read an English book about Christian 2 millenniums alone. the self-aggrandized family urged leaving soon constantly but stayed lately. I quit my reading till my son asked to play video games on his dell notebook &Haier 32' LED TV, some time after the bully family left. I know my son's serving heart, his longing for friendship/partnership. I forgive his ignorance upon meaningful resources I prepared for him, includes video games, kindle and mobile library in it. God, u see through my son across the delusion of values. u see how wonderful my son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, Hope of ChinaGod of Universe, is. enhance him by bring sooner my other sons and daughters from my Royal China, God, dad.
this dawn I again dreamed of my passed parents in family time. also recently a Nankai schoolmate now professes Buddhism in American university dwelt in my mind and dream. Its a silent busy morning, God, bring me sunshine in the tunnel toward highland my Royal China palatial circumscribes. thx, dad God. 

From 2012 on the way to rejoin
From 2012 on the way to rejoin
From 2012 on the way to rejoin
From 2012 on the way to rejoin
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Posted via email from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly...鸠昱隆嘉

Thursday, January 17, 2013

leading with respect.


hurt by Chinese air pollution. ^ since last Sunday dining out with son, my throat hurt by well-known Chinese smoky air all over the country and now sneeze, too. in dawn dreamed of living in campus or QRRS dorm. my bed in a corridor. my once QRRS colleague, also the best man of my first civil wedding, WangChangqing, also lived there. then dreamed in family I tried too many times to release hot water for some usage from heat pipe, and broke the inside plastic tube. Its urgent otherwise the heat water will run cross the house, so I hasted to ask my 3rd sister's attention for help. now its a bright morning, I sign-on QRRS check-in system, ate breakfast in dorm canteen. my son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, glad to chat with me last night online, likely for I help him find a long time missing video game. God, bring me my girl LV, Asoh Yukiko, girl Zhou, my Taiwan girl sooner aside me, bring out our prosperous offspring in time. thx God dad! 


dreamed of hometown, Wuxue. ^ in dawn dreamed first in Zhudajiu, my passed dad's village, where disgusting toilet again harassed me. when I strongly reluctantly entered it and poo, a middle aged doctor and 2 young ladies hovering around me and continuous chatting with me. all of them r villagers there. then dreamed in the town, Wuxue's bus station, those lazy and loosing ticket sale women peeking into my purse. and I had to frequently dug my purse and anxious about thieves there. Its likely the first work day QRRS, my once and long time employer, and a state-owned company, adopted card check-in system. I arranged ring in the night and It woke me up this morning. so far I succeeded sign-on in the morning crowd and now returned to dorm to open a new day in front of my notebook. God, dad, please show me sooner my Royal China, bring sooner my other children in heaven now. please let my son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, enjoy the life and cozy of Internet as I do. that's my prayer in this smoky morning after shallow snow. 


dreamed working together with son. ^ in dawn dreamed I worked with my son on a legacy system. I tried hard and completed the missing function of the old application. so my son and I was enrolled by the company. then my previous workmate called in informing QRRS, my long time employer adopted card check-in system, so hope I can sign on twice a day with the employee card. I was idle so I visited old office and filed to director for a desktop. now I surfing via corporate lan on my notebook. God, I looking forward bliss in the sunny day, grant me opener workspace step by step. God, dad, thx for recent good time with my son, with my workload. bring me sooner my Royal China to allow our glamorous task on the planet, in corner of world by China mainland. 


dreamed of my Japanese girls. ^ the dorm is warm. in dawn dreamed 2 Japanese girls in my life. one is the actor, Jutani Nami, from a Taiwan episode "爱无限" I deeply touched, the another is Asoh Yukiko, my Crowned Queen. I managed harmony between them when we dwell each together. our parents also appeared before our wedding ceremony. Asoh more self-preserved and I in dream more trying appealing to her. we also attending birth school. we had good time in love. God, time of life passing, where is our family life with my Royal China? yesterday is first day of son, warrenzh 朱楚甲's winter vacation. son more or less anxious about his school performance which so far less impressive. God, all bliss is over his living on the earth. 


dreamed of being a boiler man. ^ in dawn dreamed life of an elder boiler man. he tried to make friend of 2 girls, a Japanese girl, a Chinese girl, in campus, first by inviting the Chinese girl help him washing his clothes with reward. then found his wife and child ages missing. then closely witness the Japanese girl's life: her mother, her classmates, etc. later I visit her school with red wine and shared with her. likely I felt in love with her.
these days I busy with son, warrenzh 朱楚甲's new sites, www.woz.fm , designed it a logo, updated family sites with new sidebar &footer to include new member sites link. Chinese censorship delayed my operation heavily, but thanks God, it done. and also with my son made proud progress in our video game. God, u see the prize of my joy on the root of the planet. bring me sooner my Royal China, God dad! 


dreamed of my company, Dragon Horse. ^ dreamed I worked first for a company and pivoted a project with my smartness even not brightest. then build a company of my own for ignorance of the company I worked for. the company name is 骥, or Dragon Horse. Its first product is the rebuild of the project I previously contributed to. then the old larger company competed and tried to occupy our land by crushed with machine and cultivated our borderland. then dream my company worked on high technology I now didn't recall, but its vivid and lengthy in dawn dream. I only remembered I worked hard and enjoy it, within my company. yesterday I visit my son in the afternoon. we played video games and I taught my son about team works when he too haste to edge me out in the shooting game. when I returned to QRRS dorms, I penniless except some changes for bus. I tried to borrow a meal in a nearby restaurant where I frequented and it loaned me several times, but this time the girl casher definitely denied. however, I managed to eat a dinner loaned by another small restaurant. God, today I likely had to live with only a meal, or even worse, for my son's mom said when she cursed my visit her house will be empty today, in aim to evade me. God, bring me sooner my Royal China to home me and my sons. God, thx Dad. in this draining Chinese holiday season in PRC, sinking IS not me but the floating and hardly wrecked nation, PRC. God, save me from drift in the chill driving scattered Chinese, toward save or seize of death. God, sure is the sunny morning outside. God, blessing my 2013 and its 1st day today. 

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From 2012 on the way to rejoin
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Posted via email from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly...鸠昱隆嘉